The List of Doom

Okay, so there’s this list of questions, that I have to deal with every now and again, and sometimes it is just asked orally and other times its written, but it’s a list that will not for a second let me forget about my adoptee status. If you’re an adoptive parent, or an adoptee, you probably know this list, and it probably erks you too. Here’s a sample of said list.

Please check all that apply

FAMILY HISTORY

Has any blood relative had any of the following?

Scarlet Fever	YES	NO
Meningitis	YES	NO
Infectious Mononucleosis	YES	NO
Tuberculosis	YES	NO
Exposure to TB	YES	NO
Malaria	YES	NO
Bronchitis	YES	NO
Pneumonia	YES	NO
Pleurisy	YES	NO
Hepatitis (yellow jaundice)	YES	NO
Bladder infections	YES	NO
Rheumatic fever	YES	NO

Yes, that list, the list that can’t be answered, if you’re in a closed adoption like me. I kind of wish there was another box that says ‘Unknown’ but then again you still have to explain why. 

I love my current Doctor. Dr. Felix is great, he knows my background so he knows that sometimes we have to dig deeper, or run a few more tests, just because my family medical history is unknown. The only problem is that sometimes Dr. Felix isn’t available and being that it’s a large family practice there are about 10 other doctors I have a chance of seeing, all of which look at me kind of sideways when I tell them the only medical information I have is a family allergy to milk and aspirin.

Then the words that have never made me feel ashamed except for when I’m at the doctor’s office “I was adopted”. And after that sentence comes out of my mouth, they almost look sorry for me. Yeah, you know what, I’m sorry too, because it’s inconvenient and down right terrifying to not know what could be in store for not only me, but my two children. That’s what scares me the most. What could my genes have passed to my kids?