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Alright, maybe it's just me that is annoyed by this or maybe it really is annoying but certain aspects with religion and adoption get under my skin
I was reading a blog today about a family that "felt compelled" or "called" by God to adopt.
Now, do you see my problem with that? For all I know they wanted more children and can't have any more bio kids, or they've always wanted to adopt but now is the right time for them, but that is not what is stated in their blog.
They later go on to say something along the lines that there are 147 million orphans in the world because 147 million Christians haven't stepped up to God's calling. Wow! Really? I'm sorry, but last time I checked with my Christian friends adopting a child because its "God's Will" wasn't anywhere on their list.
Could you imagine being that child growing up in a household where you're being told that you were "rescued" and that your parents felt "called upon" by a higher power to adopt you from another country and bring you to America? Ugh! I know this isn't the only family that feels this way because I've read it before. But I believe it bothered me more with this family because they're talking about orphans, but then they begin talking about e moms in a country full of poverty.
I've had a ton of friends felt compelled or "called on" to do God's will, but that was them going to these poverty striken countries and helping provide, not try to adopt a newborn to "rescue them from their home country"
I don't know but now I've annoyed myself... I get too passionate about this stuff, the curse of being an adult adoptee I guess.
I understand completely what you're saying. I hope that no one feels (or makes their child feel) like they are rescuing. However (to play devil's advocate and because some of it is true to my beliefs) sometimes (I believe) God does lay things, like adoption, on someone's heart. It's the path that He has laid. He's taking a bad situation (whatever the situation is that led that child to be without their first family - one that happened in our world b/c it is a fallen world, but not one that God went out and "created" - He didn't WANT this child to not be with their first family, but He knew it would happen - I know that sounds weird) and bringing good out of it by creating a family. Of course it's definitely something the parent wants. I greatly desire to have my child with me. I don't feel like we're rescuing our child from anything at all. But I have prayed about this, I do think God has a plan. We could have more biological children if we wanted, but this is the desire God put in our hearts. Does that make sense? It's not to rescue, just to continue to grow our family in a different way.
ReplyDeleteI've struggle with this, it's a tough topic and I continue to struggle with it and pray about it. I am heartbroken for whatever my child will have to go through. I wish it didn't have to happen, but I'm thankful that the child will be a part of our family and that we can all love each other. Wow - this is so hard to discuss and even fully understand in my own brain. Sorry! Hope you're not offended. Just my 2 cents.
Never offended (okay thats not true but I love to hear other people's opinions and about their journeys as long as they seem educated) I do agree with you that adoption is one of those things placed in your heart, the reason I was erked was because the blog I read didn't seem to "want" this child they were trying so hard to adopt. They ephasised too much on "their mission" which to me doesn't sound like expanding a family with love but more like a CIA covert operation!
ReplyDeleteOK Nicle - that would bother me too! It's always great to "talk" with you - I really appreciate all of your insight. ;)
ReplyDeleteWorse yet, I read on someone's blog that they considered their adoption was a "physical rescue" and a "spiritual rescue". So what, now we're supposed to take children away from anyone who isn't a Christian? Boggles my mind. I can't even think about it right now without getting angry.
ReplyDeleteAnd don't even get me started on the 147 million orphans stuff. It isn't true. This article is hard to read, and I don't agree with all of it, but I do agree with some of it.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.crin.org/docs/lie_we_love.pdf
Even the ABBA fund acknowleges there are not millions of orphans, let alone adoptable orphans.
All these people who feel there is this "orphan crisis"... do any of them wonder why they have to wait months or years for a referral? There are more families waiting than there are children availble. Duh.
Forgot the link from the ABBA fund.
ReplyDeletehttp://abbafund.wordpress.com/2009/02/19/the-lie-we-love-and-the-current-face-of-the-orphan-crisis/
Thanks Lisa I have to check that out!
ReplyDeleteYeah I think I could rant for days on that topic alone!