Every person has that issue that turns into the lump under the rug. They don't talk about it in front of others, almost like a family secret, or the family drunk, they think he should quit drinking but they won't dare talk about the situation outside of family.
Funny enough, my family doesn't have those issues, only because my mom and I talk about EVERYTHING! I'll talk to anyone about anything. Personal things stay personal with close friends and family but I talk a lot and have learned to apply a mouth filter during certain moments. I'm telling you my mouth has a mind of its own!
But my DH's family on the other hand... WOW!!! Do these people suppress a lot! Affairs, brothers stealing each others wives, alcoholism, racists, you name it, I think it's in the family. And I think each person in that family is suffering, because they don't talk about it. It's all under rug swept. Yes you can heal yourself through prayer, but having been to therapy, I know there's nothing more cleansing, then talking about it. Letting it go. Processing your feelings out loud, to someone who is not there to judge but to listen.
My DH seems to get annoyed sometimes when I'm just talking things out to him. And I think its just because nothing was ever resolved with anything. If his mother was upset, she'd get in the car and drive around being pissed off at everything and everyone. She would later come home and write an angry note and stick it on the fridge. Later, everything would be fine. But nothing was resolved.
Could you imagine holding all of that resentment in?! I would explode!
But that long story is just to give you insight into what I'm dealing with right now, this week, this family.
My DH has the alcoholic Great Uncle, who lives about a half mile from us. Said Uncle always takes a family member with him on vacation every year to Myrtle Beach. This year was DH and my turn. So we planned to go on June 3. I put in vacation time at work and let DH handle the rest. So Uncle, we'll call him Harold*, keeps calling me over the weekend and I was too busy to return his calls. I call him Monday apologizing for not getting around to calling him sooner, but working 6 days a week, having a sick child, and participating in the Walk for Autism took up my weekend. He then begins to curse me out. I take it with a grain of salt since I know he's been drinking since 7 am.
Jump to Tuesday, he calls me while I am on my way to work and asks me to call him when I go to lunch. 11 am rolls around and he has called me 5 times in 3 minutes. I go to lunch, and cal him after I've finished up my lunch and he starts asking personal questions about my and DH intimate life, which then takes a nose dive into him propositioning me, and when I respond NO he asks if money will change my mind.
Uncle Harold* once again, lives only a half mile from my house, my DH is in Indiana, and I'm freaking out, because Uncle Harold has once again started blowing up my phone. He has called me 3 times since 7 am. Telling me he's sorry, wanting to talk about me cancelling the vacation, he knows I'm pissed, blah blah blah!!
All the while, the rest of the family were mad for less then a day, and then responded with "Well, at least it will be something to laugh about in the future!" Um, no!! Not funny! I want to move, any of you readers live in an area with great schools and the cost of living isn't too high?! No state is out of the question at this point....